Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
Randomize
