just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Randomize
