It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
Randomize
