My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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