it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
