I am going to give you the keys to my place
Then I'll give you the keys to my heart
Gag me
I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
