I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
Randomize
