my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
Randomize
