yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize
