i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
