Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
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