Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
Just rolled over and realized my vodka goggles are not as functional as my beer goggles
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize