I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
