we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
