then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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