fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
Semen is not good for contacts.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Randomize
