i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
Randomize
