my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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