i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
Randomize