Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Randomize
