I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Randomize