He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
Green mimosas i think yes
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
The uberlube is also flammable
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
Randomize
