Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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