I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
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