Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
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