i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
