Porn is love you can see.
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
My life is pants optional.
Randomize