How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
Randomize
