The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
