i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
