what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
