he wants to bone in the snuggie
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
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