Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
She announced her abortion via fbk
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Randomize
