i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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