If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
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