I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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