i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
Randomize