Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Randomize
