Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
either way he was missing a nipple.
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
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