if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
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