I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
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