the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
Randomize
