somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
Randomize
