She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Randomize