Do you still have your period?
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
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