guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
And the cops told us we were all naked.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
Randomize
