I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
