im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
Randomize
