I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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