would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
