Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
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