does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
This Girl Got Ghosted By Her BF Of 5 Years While On A Trip They Took For Her Birthday
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
People Are Applauding Chrissy Teigen For Getting Candid About Breast-Pumping
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it