forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Randomize
